A Friend’s Sage Advice on Finding Love

Recently, I saw a social media post by a friend of mine that really struck me as thoughtful. I am not sure what provoked it, but I knew that the words were necessary.

My friend – Dr. Allen Berry – is quite the thinker. He is a poet and a martial artist. Two vocations that essentially calls for its practitioners to be introspective about life.

On this particular day, Allen was being contemplative in regard to love.

Allen posted this quote:

Before you set out to win someone’s heart, make sure that getting them would actually be a win.

It was deep. It was thought-provoking. It was true.

It is a truth that is sorely missing in the minds, and hearts, of many young (and some old) lovers today. I thought of a number of my former high school students who I thought needed to hear this message.

So, many of them would end up with broken hearts because they missed this very point by my friend.

Allen’s striking words are a reminder that you do not want to waste your time pursuing someone if they are not worthy of being pursued. That is not to say that people cannot change. Sometimes, a person ends up becoming something different than what they were when the relationship began. This happens.

However, many times, people do not wholy look at the person that they are interested. Let’s be honest here: it can be quite hard to be completely objective about picking a mate. Nevertheless, just because it can be hard does not mean that we should bypass the hard work of analyzing ourselves and our potential mates.

One can save themselves a world of heartache and depression if they really take time to consider who has captured their heart. It is even good to seek wise counsel from family and friends that know you well and you know that they will not just tell you what you want to hear.

So, the next time you think you are falling in love, honestly ask yourself: Would winning this person’s heart actually be a win?

Please check out this video for more thoughts on this sage wisdom: https://youtu.be/E4c1RvaqTvw

Allen’s Website: https://www.poetallenberry.com/about

Published by Jerome Danner

I am a part-time blogger and writer. I have been an educator in the past and worked for a college. I dream a lot about being a lyricist and a full-time writer. When I am not writing, then I am usually chasing after a soon-to-be 4-year-old and a 2-year-old. Please feel free to send me your questions, thoughts, and/or comments at: jadanner1@yahoo.com!

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